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xingyan's tesimony Monday, October 26, 2009  Hi, I’m xingyan. In the past, I didn’t believe in religions, I thought it’s just stories made up by people about their god(s). To me, Christians were a group of holy and spiritual people, obsessed with their God. It was until a period in my life, then I realise that there really is a God, not by extraordinary incident but by ordinary people. I was a quiet person, who studies everyday. Gradually, I became quite an introvert. Everytime I meet new people, I’ll get all quiet. I can joke with my friends and everything, but at the end of the day, nothing was personal. My life in primary school was surrounded by study, study and more study. I scored very well for my results for every year but, I still feel empty. In secondary school, I begin to know more friends and I tried many things to look for a sense of belonging, but my questions were still not answered. What on earth am I here for? Where do I belong to? In 2008 around May, my friend invited me to a food party organised by his church friends. The only reason I went was because many of my friends were going. The first time I met those groups of Christians; I felt something different about them, but I don’t know what was different. Some way or another, their relationship with one another was so close, always laughing and smiling away. When I looked at this group of Christians, somehow I knew they have purpose in their lives. They have something I was searching for at that moment, and that is ‘Purpose’. Who am I? What’s my identity? What am I suppose to do? What do I want to do? All these were the questions in my mind then and I was trying to find it everywhere I could. Their substances attracted me. Having known how much problems they went through but yet seeing them living such a wonderful and meaningful life, I couldn’t understand why. I wanted to experience what they experienced. On 21st June 2008, I made a decision which from then on, changed my life, slowly but surely. I accepted God into my life and things start to change for the better. My bad habits begin to die down. I am able to interact with people more and I found someone who I am able to pour out all my problems to. I remembered one day I was feeling so stressed out for no apparent reason and was crying in my bed. Yes, I was crying. But as I prayed, I begin to felt peace in my heart. I know and I know that it was God who helped me. As time goes by I fell more and more in love with God and I realised Christianity isn’t a religion, but a relationship, with God. Having experienced all that He had done for me, I can’t imagine life without God. To me, it’s only the beginning. |
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